The Thought That Can Change Your Life


THIS is the breakthrough thought I've been living into in the fullest way I can.

This thought, "I am responsible for my results," has been a long time coming.

Because it is so much easier to pass the responsibility onto someone or something else.

  • The leftovers that had to be eaten or the plate that had to be cleaned before I got up from the table.

  • The partner who did such and such that made me mad.

  • My too busy schedule and "I don't have enough time."

  • The 'not knowing how' and 'this is hard.'

  • The boredom that led me to Target (and more purchases of things I didn't really need and more credit card debt).

  • The TV bingeing that was the result of "I had to know what happens"

Every single time I passed the responsibility to something outside myself, I did so to avoid the discomfort of doing the work.

Discomfort, my brain told me, was a bad thing.

A sign that I was doing something wrong or risky that wouldn't end well for me.

Boy, I was so wrong.

The Role of Discomfort

Taking responsibility for my results means that I have to show up and do the work if I want to get the results. The work feels really icky sometimes because I'm pushing into new, uncharted territory and leaving my comfort zone. Naturally, my brain is freaking out (because that's what brains do), sending up emergency flares of discomfort and doubt. The result is that I feel a lot of discomfort for much of my day.

For all of my life, I've avoided discomfort as much as I could. When I felt discomfort, I tried to un-feel it as quickly as I could by snacking, internet scrolling, shopping, blaming, or avoiding.

I did all of it.

What did it get me?

Ultimately, more discomfort as I had to deal with the debt, the weight gain, the unmet goals, the negative self-talk, and the hours of wasted time that I will never get back.

If I wanted my results to change, I had to change my thoughts about and relationship with discomfort.

What if discomfort could actually be a good thing?

If fearing and avoiding discomfort brought me results I did not like, what would happen if I used discomfort as my road map on my journey to achieving my goals?

Now, I'm training my brain to see discomfort as a sign of growth instead of as a sign that I should stop what I'm doing and go take a nap.

Discomfort is the price I pay for taking responsibility for getting the results I want.

I show up MUCH DIFFERENTLY to my day now that I think "I am responsible for my results" instead of "I have no control over what happens" and embrace the discomfort that comes with this thought.

Let me show you.

When I think "I have no control over what happens," I literally feel powerless.

When I feel powerless, I don't show up for myself because I think that nothing I do will matter in the long run.

  • I make excuses.

  • I look for distractions.

  • I go through my day very mindlessly and don't really engage with what I'm doing.

  • I watch the clock.

  • I avoid any kind of accountability with my coach and other stakeholders in my life

The result I get from the thought "I have no control over what happens" is that I do not meet any of my goals and am left with much disappointment.

Now, when I think the thought "I am responsible for my results," I feel empowered.

Feeling empowered, I get to work.

  • I avoid distractions and anything that could take me off course for the day. (I'll often leave my phone in the other room to help keep temptation at bay.)

  • I write my daily schedule with intention and purpose and I stick to it.

  • I give my time to the things that matter to me.

  • I don't make excuses and I don't blame.

  • I am much more proactive instead of reactive.

  • I give myself grace when things take longer than I think they should because I recognize that it's just a part of the journey.

  • I am willing to try new things and fail at them because if I decided to not try them at all, I've already